Editor#90
The fact that I do not personally know this girl and how the two of you interact with each other makes it hard to provide you with a clear and direct “yes” or “no” as to whether or not you have a chance with her. With that in mind, we can only help you discover the truth about the situation you are facing. You have to understand that the possession of feelings for another person may lead an individual to distort reality. You need to stop and ask yourself if this is happening to you. Did the girl you have feelings for explicitly state that she likes you? Did you find out through a mutual friend? If you cannot think of a single instance where she blatantly, and without a doubt, confessed a secret emotion or feeling, then you may want to think about whether or not you are misreading the situation at hand. Make sure you are honest with yourself so that you can properly assess whether or not you have a chance with this girl. It would be terrible for you to wait for her and realize that the feelings you thought she had were actually figments of your imagination. On the other hand, if you know for a fact that the relationship she is in is volatile and doomed to fail, then waiting for her may be a viable option.
Once you are positive she has feelings for you, it is natural to wonder why she is committed to another person and not to you. Maybe she actually has the same amount of interest in both her boyfriend and you, but the other guy was quicker to charm her. If you do not know the details of the relationship, do not pry into it just to get time with her. Regardless of how much we disapprove of certain couples sometimes, they still deserve a degree of privacy since romantic relationships are defined by a closeness not experienced in a typical friendship. There may be a circumstance or agreement that you do not know about that keeps them together as a couple. However, your curiosity–as much as it hurts to keep it in–should not be an excuse to be invasive. The worst thing you can do is disrupt their relationship and get on her boyfriend’s bad side. You will not be a hero in any way. Do not confront the boyfriend, especially if you do not know anything about the relationship. He may be caught by (unpleasant) surprise if he does not know you have feelings for his girl.
Instead, it is safer to talk to the person you actually care about: the girl. Start simple and fall into a deeper conversation. Depending on how long ago she confessed her feelings, it probably would be best to remind her of her words again. Do this once (with clarity) and see how she responds. It is better to be direct the first time around because if you come off too vague then you might receive an equally wishy-washy answer from her. If you nag her repeatedly about the situation, then you might not get the results you want. You do not need to manipulate her into breaking up with her boyfriend; that is a matter that she should decide for herself. When a girl gets annoyed and wants you to stop bothering her, simply listen to her request instead of getting talk-blocked. If you respect her emotions, then she will be reminded of why she developed feelings for you and perhaps like you even more!